Several theories exist as to why this change in attitude happens. Start with how "familiarity breeds new disgusting behaviour". It's not just about how the things you once thought completely charming have turned you contemptuous with the passing of time. No - it's about how that special friend has now picked up little detestable actions because he knows your generous nature will accept them. Like leaving nail clippings between magazine pages in the bathroom. Or constantly misplacing the ketchup bottle.

The Irk also happens because of too much neediness. You walk around in this relationship as if you are dragging, not quite a ball and chain, but a too-long, overworn skirt with its hem soaked in the grime of co-dependency. Finally, there's that theory about how The Irk reflects on your own insecurities, or dissatisfaction with your own life.

Letting The Irk vanish on its own is a long-term thing. It may take weeks, months - even years. But if you're so desperate for it to disappear, there is one method of last recourse - the tantrum. Because one of the most potent things about it is that it's never, ever verbalized, until the day of unbearable recourse. But a word of warning: Tantrum-throwing has a 50-50 chance of working - crank it up one way and you'll be in tears, hugging your significant other and thinking about how silly and oversensitive you've been. Either that or you'll still be in tears, mourning over the bitter end of a relationship.

Couples who are good at de-escalating arguments with humour and compliments are in good shape. Those who shut each other out or jab each other with sarcasm and insults are headed for trouble. It's never easy to handle a relationship and put it in good shape, never. After all, when you both start behaving with bitterness and derision, nobody wins.